Return to the Nirvana of Normalcy

Several people have mentioned that we hadn't updated the blog recently and I understand that the lack of updates could be taken two ways. Let me assure you that Bridget continues to do great! She had her 6 month MRI a few weeks back and it came back all clear again!!! I cannot express the relief that came with that.

Our life has returned to a more normal routine with kids back in school, kids events, kids getting colds (and in Ben's case breaking a collar bone in soccer), work at the business ever present, and so on. Of course mixed in with that is Bridget continuing her chemo cycle of 1 week on, 3 weeks off and the physical and mental ups and downs that come with subjecting your body to chemo, but she, as always, is amazing in taking it all in stride and not letting it control her life. She has integrated all of this into her and our family's psyche in such a way, that it does seem at times to be just another part of the fabric of our life not unlike any of the other parts.

God is great! When you tap into the power of that love it is amazing what a sense of peace and calm you can experience despite everything that life can throw at you. In that way bad things that happen, things that we fear of happening and pray do not, can become the exact catalysts for experiencing God in a truly honest way. With your ego no longer in the way, suddenly there is God. I can see now why Jesus said (paraphrasing), unless you become as little children, you cannot come to be with God.

I want to tell anyone reading this how appreciative we all need to be of "normal every day life". That is where my mindset is at these days. Sweet, blessed normalcy! The stuff of every day life that we all too often take for granted and even despise, not realizing how much of a gift it really is. If we all just slow our minds down enough to finally be able to see the holiness, the true gift of our every day life; then all our lives would be transformed into a more fulfilling and thankful state of appreciation for things we so take for granted. Its hard to get into that state...prayer, meditation, (Bridget and I have been doing Qi Gong and Tai Chi while praying - wonderful stuff!), trying to put into practice an attitude of giving and acceptance in our daily lives, these are things that can help and that we are using to try to stay on this course of awakening and healing.

Thank you all for your continued prayers for Bridget and our family!

Tom

P.S. Picture was taken in August in Minocqua, WI.

Home Sweet Home

All of you have been so generous. Tommy and I want to thank you from the bottom of our hearts for everything. I feel very behind in sending notes of thanks out to all of you. However, please know that we appreciate all that you've done. We are getting back on track and hope to see all of you soon!

I woke up this morning and realized my brain surgery was exactly three months ago (Tuesday, April 14th). It has been quite a journey - one with many miracles and beautiful nuances along the way! Amazing gifts of humanity were bestowed on us through all of your love, prayers, food and support during such an unexpected and intense diagnosis. It's because of all of you that this was doable and I have thrived. Tommy and I truly cannot thank you enough for sticking with us through all of this!

Since returning home June 5th I have been resting and getting my energy back. I had no idea how tired radiation could make you! Coming home has been wonderful, don't get me wrong; however, it has also been a challenge trying to keep up with the normal pace of a healthy family household. I know it will come with time. All in all, it is going excellent. I had my follow up MRI and all was clear! (The brain tumor was completely resected - still a miracle that I never want to forget!). After a month off, I also started back on chemo (Temodar); only this time I just have to take it one week a month for 6 months or so. I am being closely monitored by a local Medical Oncologist with weekly lab work to insure my body is tolerating the monthly chemo. I am extremely blessed to be doing so well. Yes, I am mostly bald, however, in the spectrum of issues that could have happened, this is nothing. Each morning I wake up and point and flex my left foot and say "Thank you!" to God for Dr. Benham Badie! I am so grateful to be able to walk! Independence Day this year had a whole new meaning to me.

The picture to the left is of some flowers that had fallen off of a tree by our cottage at City of Hope...obviously they had some help from Tommy getting arranged into the word pattern you see spelling out HOPE. It was a beautiful message for me to see on my last day of radiation treatment out there. Tommy also mentioned that he hoped the teenage boy next door to us would see it on the way to his treatment that day. Its really a message for all of us to hold on to. No matter what is going on in your life - always keep hope alive and trust in God. There is always hope!

Sincerely, Bridget

Welcome Home Mom

Hey everybody! This is Adelyn and Gretchen speaking. We are sooo happy our mom is finally home. Mom and Dad got home at midnight on June 5 while I (Adelyn) was just getting home from my eighth grade trip to St. Louis, MO. Even the pets were happy to see mom return. My mom came home to a freshly painted bedroom, new curtains, bedspread, newly planted flowers, a garden, and a clean barn:) Thanks dad, for all your hard work and for getting everything ready for mom's homecoming.

My Mom is really happy to be home, and is enjoying the peace and quiet that is nothing like the bustling California. She's been resting a lot because she has been really tired. Yesterday she met with her new local medical oncologist, who she will be following up with monthly.

Now we're all just adjusting to having our mom tell us what to do again and getting everything back into order. We are all just so thankful she's home and now we are off to soccer and band practices. Talk to you soon!

It is accomplished!

Yesterday, Bridget received the large, hand- crafted, and very inspirational sign from Sherri (her elementary school teacher friend) that you see here. It definitely gave her added strength to get to that last appointment today! Thank you Sherri and helpers! Your giving really made a difference! We laid it right outside the door for her to see on the way to the last radiation treatment this morning.

Let me restate that important point...Bridget finished her last radiation treatment today at 9am! She is done with that chapter!!! Whew Yeah!!!!! Way to go Bridget!!! She even received a medal from her radiation team after this last treatment. Dr. Radany commented on what a fighter she is and everyone was happy and sad at the same time to be leaving each others' company...lots of hugs and tears. Bridget also took her last dose of chemo for a while (she gets a month off before having to take that again, but its oral tablets and generally well tolerated)!

We are packed up and, after a few quick errands, are ready to go to the airport. Bridget will be home tonight!!!

After arriving this past Sunday to be with Bridget for her last week of treatments out here, I have to admit that it was a rough week for her at times. However, as always she managed to tough it out, get through the low points of each day, and somehow manage to get herself going to go out for dinner or just get out and about for a time. Bridget gives all the credit to Divine intervention and your constant prayers and I do too. At the same time I am also amazed at the determination and grace of my beautiful, strong, and inspiring wife. Helping to get through the week, was a visit from Bridget's cousin Peter McCormick who was out on business. We took in dinner at Mastro's where a talented musician friend of ours, Rob Gonzalez, plays a few nights a week. It was a wonderful time with great music and Peter has a natural ability to make everyone smile and laugh. Local resident and my cousin, Quinn Hanchette, had dinner with us on our last official night in California. It was so great to have him so close during all this time out here.

We have been keenly aware that Bridget's time out here corresponded with block of time in the church calendar from Holy Week to Pentecost. The walk of Christ and inspiration of the the Holy Spirit has really been a gift to experience in a new way during this time for Bridget and our family. The masses with our wonderful priest, Fr. Mark, at home with copies of sermons forwarded on to Bridget...the wonderful masses themselves truly celebrated with gusto by our fantastic congregation have contributed greatly to keeping us going as a family.

I couldn't help myself and had to post a few more pictures of just some of the additional amazing blossoms that popped since my last stay here at City of Hope. I didn't have the chance to to ask someone what they are, but the purple flowering trees are in full bloom all over out here right now. As the blooms fall, they shower the ground in a carpet of purple. Everything blooms with flowers out here, even trees that look like maples get those pink little star fish shaped blossoms you see in the picture below. Remember to slow down...smell and see the flowers in life, when you do you'll appreciate that this is life as it meant to be lived, not the hyper-paced life many of us have created for ourselves for some crazy reason. Slow down, breath in life. Pace yourself, don't race...instead enjoy the journey and gift of life. You can't force a flower to bloom when you want it to. Take time to observe it as it unfolds.

We have been told that the drain on energy Bridget has been experiencing will last for a few weeks, so please understand if we don't pick up the phone or are hermits for a while as we settle in with Bridget at home. Note that Bridget has been living and breathing medical care for weeks on end. She has shared with me that when she gets home she wants to talk about "normal things"...not cancer, not medical treatments in particular. She is ready to just get back to living her "normal life" again. Your help with this will be most appreciated.

Thank you so very much to each and every one of you for your cards, prayers, time devoted to Bridget, advice, medical care, Denise cleaning the cottage, meals, giving rides to our kids, letting them stay at your houses, offers of help, taking pictures of our kids to send to Bridget, being there during surgeries, encouraging words, hugs, pats on the back, sharing pet cats for pet therapy (Thurman rocks!), handling the extra responsibilities at work, attention to our kids at school, and so much more. Words cannot describe our deep sense of love and appreciation.

Please continue to keep Bridget in your prayers each and every day.

Love, Tom and Bridget.

Malibu to the Rescue!

As I count down the days before I will be departing City of Hope I was lucky enough to be visited by my neice (and Goddaughter) Jacque Schaefer. Jacque just finished her first year at UW-Madison and plans to pursue something medically related for her career. I think her visit here helped her see what a few options in healthcare could be and possibly helped her narrow her choices. It is so important for all of us to discuss with the younger generation what their passions and dreams are - for this will effect the future of our world!

I wish I could explain the surreal world in which I have been living! The California weather is great and there are beautiful blossoms everywhere, yet there are times when I've never felt more sad. I've become so acutely aware of each person I come in contact with - what they may be struggling with, or how they are feeling. I guess it's just a compassion that you develop when you've been knocked around a bit! I always thought I had it - the ability to connect and have compassion for others - but it has been intensified dramatically. Each human is doing the best THEY can do. So, don't get frustrated with slow drivers, slow talkers, or teenagers that don't know what direction they're going. Instead, ask them how you can help them. It's truly refreshing! YOU have the ability to make a difference in this world!

Jacque and I found ourselves at a very authentic Greek restaurant one day while visiting Malibu Beach area for some fresh ocean air. We sat out on a patio and enjoyed the atmosphere. It's so nice when friends and family have arrived here and distracted me from all of this. As you can probably see from this photo, I'm feeling pretty tired in these last few weeks of radiation. Of course, this is to be expected. I have continued to get great lab results and through your prayers and support I have found the strength to get myself to walk over to the clinic daily for these treatments. I am completely dependant on God's intercession and truly could not do this without all of you! Thank you to each and everyone of you for the prayers, cards and for those of you who have helped support our kids while I've been gone. All of this has made my time away tolerable.

Gratefully yours,

Bridget

Memorial Day Weekend!

It feels like it's been a long journey out here in "sunny California"! I'm ready to face the chilly spring weather of Wisconsin! I was so fortunate that my sister, Peggy, did a return trip out here to visit over the holiday weekend along with our daughter, Gretchen (age 11). This was really refreshing to see them! Gretchen skipping around looking for geckos, hopping on the "musical tiles" in the rose garden and we explored the San Gabriel Mountains (Memorial Day)! Looking for a picnic spot was a little challenging, however, we really enjoyed the change in scenery. Peggy was the brave reliable driver going up the mountain road...we made it to two dams which were beautiful, however, the surrounding landscape was very desert-like. Not really a place where you would spread out your picnic blanket. So we backed up the Tahoe and enjoyed our picnic from there. We also found a few friends along the way - see Peggy with Mark Twain in downtown Monrovia, CA!

All in all things are going well. I'm just marching on through the prescribed treatments...knowing that God is protecting me and that I will get through this one day at a time. Psalm 23 comes to mind frequently this week. As much incredible support as all of you have provided, there are still those lonely moments when you need to lean on your faith as your guide. It is very comforting to know that I'm never alone - my prayers for a miracle have been answered! I'm walking a thin line between resting and strengthening. It's really amazing to me how resilient the human body is. Truly a miraculous work of God.

As I walk along the City of Hope "campus" buildings everyday - most of them have signs that read "Research" of some sort going on. I'm so very curious and would like to learn more while I'm here, however, I guess now that I only have one week left, it's not quite enough time for an internship! I am so interested about what studies are going on and what he future holds for cancer treatments. However, for now, I'm back to focusing on healing and strengthening so I can return to my real life in Wisconsin June 5th (this is also my final day of radiation)! Many have said that the radiation is cumulative and that I will be tired for a few weeks after this. I'm okay with that - just imagine, I could have been paralyzed! I never want to forget the miracle that occurred. So many miracles in such a short span of time.

I can't tell you how much all of your support and prayers have made a difference! Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

Sincerely, Bridget

Counting Down!

Hello my Friends! It was another week of getting through Dr. appointments, labs, daily radiation, etc...but I have to say that I am starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. My sister, Susie stayed with me last week and she did a great job at keeping me positive and realizing that I only have less than 10 more radiation treatments...so we're counting down! I think Susie was hoping to see more movie stars - that was the only disappointment. However, we did have a surprise visit from our brother, Stuart! How crazy - he had a meeting in Las Vegas and decided to drive over, take us out to dinner and then drive back for his meeting! The photo shows us in the Rose Garden with a "musical tile chime". Very unique and challenging.



Susie and I tried to take advantage of any moment we could when I had a decent energy level. We explored the neighboring cities and found the quaint old downtown areas with unique shops and restaurants. We were also lucky enough to visit the famous Huntington Library Garden. Very lush and beautiful beyond description!
















In contrast, I've had my moments of wondering if I was human anymore - truly a weird sensation when you have a feeling that your body is an object in an experiment rather than just being yourself. I think the first wave of that feeling came over me when I opened the medicine cabinet and wondered "who are those for"? I've always been someone who just took an occasional multivitamin! I just keep taking the medicine as prescribed (thank God I have a pill organizer to keep track of this stuff!) Reality hits when you start losing your hair and then you have each set of doctors/nurses gazing at your incision giving advice on how to heal. It's all somewhat surreal. Even so, I'm happy to part of the trusted "experiment" here at City of Hope. My experience has been filled with amazingly gifted and compassionate physicians and other healthcare providers. I really can't emphasize how I truly know I came to the right place for my treatment!

I think Jaclyn Carey and Susie had the toughest job as caregivers out here. It's hard when the person you're caring for just feels tired - even the question of "what can I make you for lunch" isn't well received. It's just an overwhelming feeling of fatigue. I know this is only temporary. I am determined to march on -thanks to all of you - my family and friends who have provided SO much support through prayers, words and cards. All of your love is strengthening me. It is God's love working through you. I have never felt afraid or alone. Words are insufficient at expressing my gratitude!

Thank you for your continued love and support!
Bridget

Another Week Down!

It's hard to express how much love and support I've received. I thank each and every one of you for your continued prayers!


My dear friend, Jaclyn Carey arrived after Mother's Day and stayed for the week. What a week...it just seemed that each day was unpredictable as far as energy. I guess I can say that the Drs. were right - the chemo and radiation can really wipe you out. Of course, I didn't think it would happen to me, but Jaclyn helped pull me through each and every day...from cottage repairs to reminding me to breath!

She also helped keep my spirits up by reading inspirational prayers and books. We had a wonderful time together. Thank you Jaclyn, words are inadequate to express my appreciation.

Of course with the lower energy levels together with some computer issues, I have not kept up the blog as much as I would like. Please keep up your prayers and note that the settings have been changed on the lbog so anyone should be able to post a comment without necessarily being a "member"...so your comments are always welcome. My address is also listed in a previous blog.

My energy may be lower but my faith is strong! My sister Susie is here, sister Peggy is coming this weekend and brining our youngest daughter Gretchen. I cannot wait to see her! Our other two kids, Ben and Adelyn are a bit too wrapped up with finishing school on a strong note but I'll see them in a few weeks.

The picture of the tasty treats is of frozen yogurt from the famous Pinkberry...California's trendy, yummy yogurt establishment. The flavor on the left is pomegranate green tea with fruit and vanilla with chocolate on the right. Mission accomplished Jaclyn!

Thank you again everyone!

Greatfully yours,

Bridget

Mother's Day - 2009

Happy Mother's Day! I was so lucky to spend the day with my sister, Peggy. Here we are in Pasadena once again (the car seems to like driving that way). We're in front of the City of Pasadena's Auditorium. We had a very relaxing/rejuvinating Mother's Day. We really laughed a lot and enjoyed each others company.

I received a special Mother's Day package from the kids & Tommy. We also took some time to do Skype (online video)...so it was really special. Thanks for all of the artistic cards, kids!

Cinco De Mayo Harp Concert

Harp music and Cinco De Mayo - seemed like an unlikely combination for some reason. Since everything seems a little unbelievable recently, why not? On May 5th, there was a Harp Concert offered in the Helford Hospital lobby. Sally and I attended the concert by Alfredo Rolando Ortiz (Renowned South American Harpist). Yes, as you know, I grew up in a home listening to harp music everyday...soothing angelic "Magic Fountain" music being played by my Irish mom, Marilyn. This harp concert completely opened my eyes to the Paraguayan harp. Alfredo - thank you for educating me!! I feel very naive that I didn't know Spanish harps and musical styles were developed throughout South America and Mexico. Completely different style and flavor than what I have experienced in listening to the harp. It is something to experience...check out this harp music - AMAZING!

http://www.youtube.com/AlfredoRolandoOrtiz

The City of Hope continues to be an amazing journey of healing. I truly feel like I'm being cared for by the best of the best in every area of my medical care... This past week was a big week...starting the oral chemotherapy, continuing daily radiation treatments, getting my stitches out (May 6th), etc. I feel like I'm getting into the thick of it...as it is a daily routine now to organize medications, making sure you're following "Doctor's Orders" (which there are many) and somehow keeping sane. As expected, my hair is falling out on the right side (where they radiate daily) and the radiation has made my incision very irritated on that side...therefore, I really didn't get all of the stitches out...just half of them for now. I will see Dr. Badie and one of his PA's, Roger, on Wednesday to finish the task. All in all it is going well and I continue to thank God for my skilled surgeon each morning I wake up to see that my left foot is working well! I don't ever want to take that for granted. There are so many patients at City of Hope facing serious illness and I pray for them as I know we all have our own cross to bear. I pray that each of us has a close connection with God and that we all remember to pray constantly.

"If God be for us, who can be against us? (Romans 8:31)."

And as I ponder...I think, WOW, this really happened...I flew to CA and had the entire tumor removed...did a clinical trial and now I'm proceeding with the standard gold treatment with Temodar/radiation. I am so blessed to be here for this treatment plan with the best surgeon, best radiation oncologist and best medical oncologist...not to mention all of the other compassionate team members: nurses, radiation techs, etc. Yes, the daily radiation treatments are getting a bit mundane (and there are waves of fatigue/sadness) however, I want to get through the course of treatment so I can know that I've done everything possible to beat this. Along with all of this "clinical" treatment I have been lifted up and protected by all of your prayers. Please continue to pray for my energy to get through this chemo/radiation phase!

Friday night cousin Sally passed the baton on to my sister, Peggy. Sally was an amazing caregiver...not only medically speaking (Sally had some great PT suggestions for strengthening), but also just brightening my spirits. She even taught me how to knit. Don't laugh, it's harder than you think! .It's "official" now that Peggy has full responsibility of the one key to the cottage, one key to the Enterprise Tahoe and her bag is on the famous luggage rack. Funny ~ Tommy purchased a brand new luggage rack from a local hotel here so our caregivers would have a place to put their suitcase in this small cottage. We've always wanted one of those for our guest room at home.

On a lighter note, I was asked by the Marketing and Communications Department to help out with a promo video they are putting together to promote The City of Hope. They have a Yoga class (for patients and caregivers) that I have started participating in (gently/modified version)...so that was part of the shoot...then there was another shoot that featured the doctor/patient relationship. Dr. Badie and I were filmed having a conversation in a hospital walkway. It was a whole new experience to me. Quite a crew, Directors, cameramen, sound specialist, etc. (I think Dr. Badie has done this before...what was that movie you mentioned you were in?). I wish I had more photos to share, but the camera ran out of batteries. Maybe the Marketing and Communications department will forward a few shots to me or we will see the video when it's all done!

Anyways, it certainly is an honor to be asked to help promote such an oasis of healing and care. City of Hope is immersed with hope. As one brick bench sign reads : There Is Always Hope. Please never forget that no matter what you're facing. All of you, my friends, family and even strangers have given me hope. Thank you so much for your continued love and prayers!

The hardest part of this is being away from home and kids - Great job keeping focused on school and sports kids! As hard as this is, I know I came to the right place! We'll get through this. and will be stronger in the end...one day at a time.

Gratefully yours,

Bridget

P.S. Happy Mother's Day weekend!

May Is Here!

May is here - Spring has arrived! I've always looked forward to the month of May - buds on the trees, birds returning, the Kentucky Derby (always the first weekend in May), the excitement that Summer is around the corner!

This May has had all of this plus more...I was so happy to turn the calendar page to May this year...knowing that it meant one step closer to finishing my California medical stay. Don't get me wrong, my medical care has been superb and obviously I've had so much support from family and friends that it almost looks like I'm on some kind of vacation in California (site seeing daily, etc.). I really cannot explain how comforting it has been to have all of your prayers and support. As you know, Tommy was here the first two weeks, then my brother Stuart flew the kids out and stayed with me for a week. Stuart was quite the tour guide...I just buckled myself in the Tahoe and put my feet up. The California freeway is crazy...Stuart even suggested that maybe I should wear a helmet as we drive around! Ha! We safely made it to many exciting destinations after my daily radiation treatments. We just monitored my energy level and slowly made our way around. Some of the great destinations included: Hollywood, Rodeo Drive, Venice Beach, Malibu (lunch at Duke's), Santa Monica, Huntington Library Garden and the Pasadena Rose Bowl. Wow...it really does sound like a vacation, doesn't it? I guess I just want to input little reality here...Stuart attended the longest Drs. appt. ever reviewing the Clinical Study, what the next step is for the chemo/radiation, what to expect for side effects, etc. He took detailed notes on medication dosages, etc. Thank you Stuart, for walking with me daily to my radiation treatments, for just being there...it was just so amazing that you could actually take a full week to be with your sister during this crazy time. I'll never forget it!

So, taking the experimental drug for the clinical trial is over and now (starting today) I'm moving on to the next phase - the oral chemo medication and continuing to do the daily radiation treatments. It's a real milestone. I actually started taking the chemo medication on Saturday as instructed. I thought it would be a good "test" to see how I tolerated it as it can cause some people to feel very sick (I learned quickly that it is a good idea to take Zofran...the anti-nausea drug). About 1/2 hour after taking the Temodar (chemo) I felt seasick...yuck, that's the worst. I didn't actually get sick (thankfully). Thank goodness, my next caregiver had arrived. SallyAnn...my cousin! Sally took one look at me and ran to the nearest vending machine to purchase a Sprite...I ran to the medicine cabinet and took the Zofran. We got through it! Now I know just to take the Zofran & then the chemo...all of this has to be done on an empty stomach...an hour before radiation. So, this morning, I have followed this routine and we're about to walk to the radiation appointment. I guess I felt like I had to add some reality to this blog...it's really not a "vacation" out here even though the sites and wonderful distractions have been the silver lining in this stay.

Sally and I ventured out on Sunday to Old Town Pasadena (see us in front of Pasadena City Hall) and really enjoyed the atmosphere. It was a beautiful sunny day and Sally was an excellent driver on the California freeway. Of course, I wouldn't expect that she would have any trouble - Sally and her husband, Bob, spend their winters in Florida and navigate their way around the channels/ocean in Ft. Meyers...wow, I'm in good hands once again with my caregiver. Sally has also been brave enough to clean my incision twice a day which is key right now as the right side is irritated from the daily radiation.

Each morning I wake up and move my left leg/foot, touch each finger to my thumb and say a prayer of thanksgiving to God - I can do this! I will continue to march through this treatment! I know all of this would not be possible without Divine Intervention and all of your continued prayers. Thank you! Love to all, Bridget

Kid's Visit and Beyond

Tom writing here from our valley back in La Crosse. Bridget is doing great! She is tolerating radiation very well and is almost done taking the Valacyclovir that is part of the experimental treatment. She will start on Temodar at week's end or start of next week.

Please keep praying for her. Many are asking what they can do for us and that is the most important thing. Also, posting comments on the blog is great so she can read new messages or send her a written note. Please no gifts or food...just your encouraging words. Her family is keeping her well stocked with more food than one can eat. You can send cards or letters to: City of Hope, Attn. Bridget Hanchette/Cottage 131, 1500 E Duarte Blvd, Duarte, CA 91010.

This past weekend the kid's flew out with their Uncle Stuart (Bridget's brother...in back row of 3rd picture) for a long weekend and we are now back. It was great to be together as a family again and we had lots of fun. We saw Hollywood and Rodeo Drive...mostly a driveby which was quite enough. The next day we went to Venice Beach and enjoyed the ocean. Quite a cast of characters at these places. Mostly we hung out and just spent time together. Bridget's niece (Kristi), her husband (Antonio), and baby (Quinn) also stopped by for a visit having driven up from Phoenix (Sorry, the pictures of them are on the camera I left with Bridget). We also had a visit from some friends of ours from Tucson Arizona (Bert and Anne Williams) on Sunday morning who have been some stalwart prayer partners through all of this like so many of you (second picture). The first picture is of the girls on one of the magnificent trees on the grounds at City of Hope.

On Monday, the kids went with Bridget to her radiation appointment and were able to observe and learn about her treatment including seeing how Bridget gets positioned with the mesh mask on to hold her head in place while getting the treatment. It was good for them to see what Mom is up to each day with this. They also meant some of her caregivers who were so happy to meet the kids.

I left with the kids on Monday afternoon, leaving Bridget in the very capable hands of her brother Stuart. Stuart is an amazing guy and very curious. Upon his arrival, he immediately purchased maps of California and detailed maps of the area around Duarte. I am sure he will be showing Bridget many cool sights during his time there. Each week a new family member or friend will rotate through to stay with Bridget over the next four weeks. This will really break up the time for Bridget and keep her going. I will then head out for her last week there to be with her during her final appointments, get her packed up, and head home together.

I am writing this on Wednesday morning and heading back to the office for the first time in weeks this afternoon (This will be my last entry for a while. Its now all you Bridget). We have our incredible Identity Works staff to thank for our being able to focus on healing and family while they handled everything while we were both gone. You are an incredible group of people and we cannot thank you enough. Thanks team! I have to admit that it is tough to go back to work as I have been in such a different world now for weeks. I know it is going to take some adjusting. It seemed every time one walked out the door of our cottage at City of Hope, you were presented with another mini miracle or example of the best humanity has to offer...people at their best.

I came to enjoy doing the laundry there (something I have never enjoyed in the past) because every time I did, I would meet some person with amazing strength and faith whose story would provide additional inspiration and confidence for us to continue to walk our own path with confidence through this part of our life. The world would be a better place if we all had to rotate through places and times like these in order to really give us all perspective on what really matters in life. Trust me its not your bank account, your job, whether your kid's being treated fairly by the coach, and all of the other things we spend so much time fretting over each day. Of course at some point in time, we all do face challenges. I encourage you to face these challenges with an open mind and heart. You will find blessings there if you're open to them. Bridget's example has been such a gift to our family and I know you all as well. As usual, she is incredibly optimistic, positive, faithful, generous, and strong as she faces all of this.

There is so much to say, and yet I find myself unable to express it all right now. All I can say for now is that for anyone still wondering about many of the things that I too struggled with over the years in my faith journey such as why do bad things happen to good people, know that God is here and seen through the example of people like Bridget, seen through you all that are supporting her, seen through the staff at City of Hope, and the patients and families of those we have met. God is here, right here, right now. We just don't see or feel that connectedness often times because we are not present in our own life. We are thinking about what we have to do tomorrow or what we did wrong last week. We are over committed and overstressed mainly about all sorts of things that don't really matter. One thing I have really learned through all of this so far, is that if you want to experience God, you have to be present in this moment. The present moment is where you find and experience God's grace. Tragedy, illness, all those things we see as negative are fortunately or unfortunately often the only things "loud" enough to get our attention and put us in the moment. Suddenly all of that "stuff" we thought was so important in our lives is instantly not very important at all and there lo and behold there is God still waiting for us.

There have been so many blessings, so many small and large examples of God walking with us these past weeks that I can hardly begin to tell you. You all are part of that blessing. Other examples include: having made it through the first surgical procedure just days after the diagnosis to wake up with Bridget and have us both almost simultaneously announce that these have been the best days of our lives. Or looking back to a moment just 2 weeks before getting blindsided with this news, when my friend Craig Chapmen gave me a CD after a discussion we had on faith in the midst of terrible events in the lives of good people. The sermon was by a well-known preacher in which he was telling a story of a friend of his who had lost a child and could not pull himself out of a tailspin of why me self-pity long after the loss. He shockingly said to this friend, "Why not you?" and proceeded to explain. At first I was horrified by what he had said to this man and I could not stop thinking about it for days. Over the course of the next few weeks, I came to peace with how he had counseled this man and felt an understanding of the higher meaning that was being conveyed. Shortly thereafter, I found myself in the ER with Bridget expecting her to get a prescription for a migraine, when we were told that she had a brain tumor. That sermon on a CD about "why not you", a few weeks earlier somehow now girded me, gave me a resolve and strength in the face of an unexpected event like this, and I asked that God give me Bridget's burden to carry. Coincidence that Craig gave me that CD or was it God working in our life? I might have said happy coincidence a few weeks ago, but having experienced one "coincidence" after another each and every day over the past few weeks, I cannot call this or any of the other experiences we have been having anything like coincidence. Its God's grace pure and simple.

Lay in bed next to your wife with fear in every pore of your body over what she and your family is facing and have her cry with pure joy in the night as she tells you she is hearing every one of your prayers right then...hearing your words, your voice complete with volume control wash over her and tell me that's not God. Walk with your wife in a rose garden the day after being released from the ICU and successful brain surgery when a stranger strides up to you on a mission to tell you her story of cancer, declare her faith, and then proceed to tell your wife that she needs to take care of herself, shouldn't skip lunch (which Bridget often would), not to worry so much about our kids, how this will make them stronger, and various other things that Bridget seemed to need to hear as though this woman (Vera) could look right through Bridget, and tell me that's not God.

I think about Bridget's brother (Stuart), cousin (Sally), friend (Jaclyn), sisters (Peggy & Susie) that are rotating through to take turns being with Bridget each week while I'm away and I see how perfect a fit they are with each of their particular attributes for that particular week with Bridget. For example strong, sensible, and curious Stuart to be with her the day her family leaves, perfect. He will give her strength and take her to interesting places to keep her engaged in the present. Perfect fits for the perfect time during her treatment. Each one perfectly placed at the right time. I didn't pick when they would come or even who they would be.

Can you say harps? (See earlier blog entry) Hi God. Just example after example, right down to the day we left.

The day the kids and I left, we were being picked up by a car service (GoSedan) for a ride to the airport. The driver got out (Levestor), looked right at Bridget and asked how she was doing. He explained that he was a pastor at an inner city church in LA and that he drove on the side to earn money for his family. He wrote Bridget's name down and said that he would add her to the prayer chain at his church. Awesome more prayers for Bridget! We had a nice conversation on faith on the way to the airport. After helping take our bags out of the trunk, he addressed Ben, Adelyn, and Gretchen one at a time and told them how good they were doing, would continue to do, and how he would pray for us all and that he would be there for us any time of day or night. He gave us his card from his church. Are you listening? God is talking here and now.......if you're listening. Well I am listening. I am determined as I go back to work, to continue to keep myself present even as I plan for tomorrow and get wrapped up into the "real world" because I now know that the present moment is where we find God....not yesterday, not tomorrow, not 5 minutes from now, but in this present moment. That is why prayer is so important. Prayer puts us in the present moment if we can turn our brain away from the tasks that are constantly running through it.

Shortly after Bridget's diagnosis, as I prayed (thankful that I wasn't bitter as I might have been had I not meditated on the message of "Why not you" in the days leading up to this) I heard and felt God telling me, "Who else would I use to try to keep bringing this world back to me if not people like Bridget that have the ability to touch so many people in a positive way?" It gave me comfort. I have since heard stories from some of you of how Bridget's journey and example has brought you or others back to their faith confirming this. Bridget you have been and continue to be a shining example of what God can do right here, right now if we are just conscious enough to see it. Thank you. I love you.

Finally, I literally just noticed that our part-time driver to the airport and full-time pastor's card that he gave us has the perfect scripture verse printed on it to end this blog entry. Bridget I am giving you "the look of knowing". God is great! God bless all of you. Here it is: "Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me." Rev. 3:20 NKJV

Photo Tour

Hi everyone, Tom here. Just a quick note to let you know that if you are interested one of the following links should give you a photo tour of some of the sites we have been seeing while out here. I think you'll see just how healing this place is not only from the excellent medical care but also the beautiful grounds and approach to treating the whole person...body, mind, and spirit.


The first pictures are with Bridget's amazingly skilled and humble neurosurgeon, Dr. Badie, then pictures from the grounds (see the white "cottages" we are staying in), Bridget with the tye-die shirt and white hat after the first day of radiation, and a relaxing day at Santa Anita horse race track on Sunday. If someone would have told me that the first week's itinerary would include major brain surgery on Tuesday followed by a day at the races on Sunday, I would have said they were nuts.....but that is just how it happened. Amazing and what an amazing setting with San Gabriel mountains as a backdrop. Thanks to my cousin Chris (Quinn) Hanchette for being our guide that day and helping in numerous other ways. What can you say about awesome cousins, Bridget is blessed with all sorts of fantastic cousins....that would take me days to write about. Thank you McCormick cousins, you amazing people!

Here are the links (both are the same pictures, just listing both to hope that at least one of them works. Be sure you have lots of time and a good internet connection as there are many pictures:

http://cityofhopeandsantaanita.shutterfly.com/

http://cmd.shutterfly.com/commands/pictures/slideshow?site=cityofhopeandsantaanita&page=cityofhopeandsantaanita&album=23

Stand By Me

Hi Everyone! Bridget here attempting my first post on the blog. It's all new to me, the blog, the tumor, the journey! So here goes...

You know when something major happens and it just sends you reeling? It seems there is no time - just space - and you have major flashbacks...sometimes to your early childhood. Well, sit back as we go back in time a bit...so much can happen so fast and maybe this is why our minds work this way to somehow try to process the information at hand. I think our mind wonders and wants to figure out the series of events that could lead to such a diagnosis.

Back in college, Tommy & I decided to join the Sailing Club. (just so you know his whole family calls him Tommy - it's not just a wife thing. Many times at work someone will say "Tom" and I will wonder who that is - For me that's the work name). Really neither of us know anything about sailing even though I come from a family of Irish Sailors...the McCormicks. My Mom's side of the family (her brothers and now the next generation) are big into sailing...all I remember from this childhood experience is "duck, here comes the boom!" But for whatever reason, we joined the Sailing Club and a fleet of six sailboats set out from Florida to Bimini - the closest and smallest Bahama island. We set out at 3 pm and sailed through the night. My mom's advice before leaving was to stay on the deck as long as I could and help navigate to avoid being seasick. She was right. I was the last one up there as we sailed in the dark and the rains were pouring down. Finally, the captain asked that I hold the wheel while he went under to get his rain gear. I couldn't believe what I was doing!

When morning came and we settled our sailboat into the calm tropical bay I realized why we did this. The dazzling deep tropical blue water was so clear! You could see to the bottom. I couldn't wait to go swimming and experience the islands! We went diving later that day. Tommy was already Scuba Certified as were a few others on our boat (there were six of us total on the boat - including our Captain-Chic Perger, the best of the fleet). I was just happy snorkeling along...the sand, sun and tropical fish were so incredibly vibrant. Later that day we went to a new spot and Chic showed us how to hunt for lobster. Tommy loved this and was good at it. I swam above with a netted bag and watched with my snorkel/mask as Tommy would dive down and use the harpoon to get the lobster and then swim up and place it in the bag. It was later that sunny afternoon when those that were Scuba Certified dove down deeper and came up all excited about the sea turtles and grouper, etc. that I thought maybe I am missing something just snorkeling. When we returned back to La Crosse Tommy really encouraged me to get certified. Well, I did, eventually, it was in Marquette, MI. I took the class at NMU (Northern Michigan University). They had a nice pool and a great instructor. Little did I know that I would be doing two open water dives - in December - in Lake Superior to pass the class. Aside from giving childbirth I think this was one of my greatest accomplishments - entering the cold black waters with a wetsuit on as the snow gently came down. The instructor claimed the Lake Superior water temperature varied only slightly between summer and winter there. Of course I had a dive partner - a robust guy who arrived with a Santa hat on. Funny. It was a real "mind game" entering that water, one that I had to conquer, one that prepared me for other dives and other challenges.

I've been a swimmer my whole life. Because we hung out at our Grandpa's lake house in Madison, WI every Sunday as kids - all of the cousins sailing and swimming, fishing, water skiing, etc. I did the lifeguard thing, swimming instructor, etc. However, there is one concept I realized I needed to work on regarding snorkeling/Scuba diving- "Even though you can't see, you can still breath"- every diver needs to remember this - just in case your mask gets kicked off when you're 40 feet under the ocean! Just because your mask comes off, the regulator with O2 keeps working! This really took some thinking and practice. And good thing I did practice because later as Tommy and I did multiple ship wreck dives in the Great Lakes and various other tropical dives I would need to clear my mask at various depths. The trust and communication between Tommy and I as dive partners was incredibly strong. I really believe these diving experiences developed our steadfast companionship and intimate connection. The utmost in respect and communication. He never left my side under the sea and always held my hand - directing me to see the most beautiful exotic life.

So, how does all this have to with me being diagnosed with a brain tumor? As I said, the information came on so quickly. I had these terrible headaches which I was writing off as migraines or something...just trying to treat them on my own with Advil and persevere at work and home. Then when it was intolerable and we went to the ER , and from there to getting a biopsy, to learn the news...I just felt compelled to literally dive out of the hospital and run. I was not going to be a statistic of someone with a malignant brain tumor. I had been thrown a curve ball and it landed in the wrong brain! The truth is, I don't fall into the age group that generally gets this type of tumor...this makes me even more confident that I can beat this. So after shaking the Neurosurgeon's hand and thanking him for doing the biopsy without causing any paralysis we planned a family trip to Discovery Cove - where EVERYONE that arrives puts on a wetsuit and dives in!

Getting launched into this "brain tumor journey" has been a separate journey for each of our family members. Gretchen, Adelyn, Ben, Tommy & I are all on our own personal journeys of discovery and survival as we walk through our daily lives. This is why going to Discovery Cove and entering the same water at the same time was soooooooo healing. It's hard to describe the magic of the water. Discovery Cove may sound commercialized or fake compared to the real ocean, when in fact, once you enter the warm lazy river or the huge salt water lagoon you are lost in the natural immersion. Just take a moment to imagine it. You're floating along buoyantly due to the rubber wetsuit - feeling the soothing water, floating along, enjoying the quietness of being under the water, hearing your breaths in and out and visually taking in the underwater world. After a while you climb up and out a few steps and enter through a castle-like door into a beautiful aviary. There are exotic birds that actually land on you and eat fruit out of the cups that you hold. Next we made our way over to the large Salt Water lagoon. This water is a bit chillier and you really become aware of your presence in God's creation. The neon colors, the way the schools of fish swim in synchronicity, the leopard sea rays below gliding along effortlessly. When I entered this water on April 4th of this year with my family it united us on this journey. I cried and cried salt water tears into my mask as I gave God thanks that I was able to celebrate my birthday with my kids and husband - swimming and walking after having to go through an unplanned biopsy surgery. The scar on my head was mostly healed as I swam around...the salt water and sun felt like salve. The tears kept flowing and finally I took my mask off and connected with Gretchen and Adelyn on a rocky ledge above the vibrant lagoon. They were enjoying it as much as me. It was amazing to all of us how beautiful God's creatures and colors are! This salt water united us as a family on this journey, which is what we needed before Tommy and I had to fly out here to California on Easter Sunday. Kids - I am so proud of how well all of you are doing - Keep up the great work!

As I continued to swim in the saltwater and cry I began praying for all of you who have been standing by me through this experience in prayer. I cried and gave thanksgiving for all of you who have put my name on prayer lists and who have continually prayed daily for me. Words are insufficient to describe my gratitude for this. I am overwhelmed by the immense power of prayer,the peace, the protection and strength I feel. The prayer chains have literally spanned across the world now due to all of your love. This is like the salt water that connects all nations and all of us. We are one and God is good. All is well.From Bimini, to Discovery Cove, to City of Hope...I think I am starting to catch up with what is going on in my life! However, I still have moments when I'm wondering -What am I doing out here? Staying at Hope Village in a little white cottage healing from major brain surgery. Wow. I am still reeling from watching Tommy methodically make flight arrangements for Florida, hotel reservations, car rentals, arranging neighbors and friends to take care of the homestead while we were gone, etc. Then on to the next phase, arranging flights etc again for the California trip, not to mention all of the details in being a patient advocate and caregiver as I healed from the biopsy and needed to make sure I had every pre-op test to clear for surgery once we arrived in California. The logistics are mind boggling! However, for those of you who know Tommy - one of his greatest strengths is perseverance. He doesn't stop until it's done! I have observed him accomplish projects at work and home that are beyond belief - truly the work of 5 men. As they say our strengths can also be our weaknesses. Working this hard really isn't the best approach and I think Tommy will be in a healthier balance now that his journey to City of Hope is underway.

Tommy has been an incredible patient advocate, nurse, steadfast protector and healer on this journey. Our love has exponentially grown during all of this. He claims that I'm the amazing one and I have to say it is he who's the amazing one. Being the caregiver is not easy and he has done it so effortlessly. Tommy has not left my side during this. He even slept in the ICU bed with me at Gundersen! Out here he has attended each and every appointment by my side. He has done the research, made the appointments, attended the appointments, followed up with watching me take each pill. What a husband I have. I am so blessed. I have to say that when we went through "marriage preparation" back in 1988 our wonderful priest and friend instructed us well. First of all, he recognized that we were truly Best Friends prior to lovers. This is huge. Then from his advice we have always taken time to Share (How are you feeling today honey?) Not just Dialogue - (did you get the milk and newspaper?). Ray Runde, you have guided and given Tommy and I the handles to climb this mountain!

I want to thank all of you - you are all caregivers in my mind. Thank you for all of your prayers and support during this six week stint in California. To Grandma and Grandpa, Susie, Peggy, Stuart, Greg who have helped at our home during this time. To the Hartig family for guiding us to Dr. Benham Badie and for your unending prayers & friendship, to Heather for the family photos that are are keeping me going out here visually, to Roncalli Newman and others who have delivered food to our home. To Tommy's brothers Steve and Billy for being here and standing by him during the surgery. To our West Salem community and friends who are getting our kids to and from practices. The list goes on and I am afraid that once you start its like the Academy Awards, you don't want to forget anyone, but you know who you are. All of you are caregivers - and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your love and support.

I will post shorter updates as the weeks go on here at City of Hope. So far my experience here has been indescribable due to multiple miracles happening. I'm thankful Tommy has captured some of them and shared them up until now. The grounds are beautiful and this little cottage is only a few blocks away from all of the appointments/hospital. As far as how I feel - I am doing well and progressing. My incision has pain and I am managing that well. I have been on a drug called Dexamethasone (right from the start - it reduced the brain swelling and relieved the terrible headaches) but makes me very revved up and makes sleeping difficult. It also makes you feel puffy. I am finally weaning off of this (because I don't have a tumor -yea!). I am so thankful that I'm weaning off this and heading into the next phase of radiation with oral chemo. I'm ready to keep the ball rolling with this progressive treatment. I'm also happy that I am contributing to the research of this clinical trial that will hopefully reveal new treatment options for the future. I start radiation therapy on Tuesday and will receive this everyday (with weekends off). My brother, Stuart, is coming out here with all three kids for a visit and I am SO excited for that. I know this will give my recovery a boost. I miss you kids - get out here as soon as you can!

God Bless each and everyone of you and your families and friends! Love and peace to all! Here is a link that shows just as salt water connects the continents, music is universal as well....truly God's gift. http://vimeo.com/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=2539741


Gratefully yours,
Bridget Mary Hanchette

Bridget is out of the Hospital!!!

Tom writing again....Just 2 short days after major brain surgery, Bridget was released from the hospital amazing all of us. As my Dad keeps saying, "Glory be to God"! She is doing fantastic and is back at our nice cottage on the grounds here at City of Hope...as I type this she is sleeping soundly. I am so glad for this as sleep has not come easily for her over the past weeks.

We both have been so connected throughout this experience with a sense of peace and knowing that God is with us. I have no words to describe this and I'm probably repeating myself from earlier blogs but it has been a life altering experience these past weeks. We have been giving thanks to God for this experience throughout and we have continued to receive signs that He is with us on each and every step. While some of these signs have been on a grand scale such as on the dolphin encounter when Bridget was being given the Happy Birthday boat buoy from the dolphin...I didn't mention earlier that just before she stepped forward to receive the buoy from the dolphin a skywriter plane had begun spelling out something in the sky but we couldn't tell what it was at first. After Bridget received the buoy and was standing there with tears of joy, our son Ben, nudged me and said, "Look Dad, it says...." and there in beautiful backdrop to Bridget were the words written in white on the deep blue sky..."Jesus Loves You". Bridget and I looked at each other and just had to laugh out loud. While this was really a sign on a grand scale, we have had just tons of small intimate signs along the way from God that we understand instantly without having to exchange words, we just look at each other knowingly and smile giving thanks to God. Please don't misunderstand this to mean signs that we have experienced because things now seem to be going well with this journey, these have been signs throughout this process and this knowing that God's grace is all around us is just a constant knowing regardless of whether there is good news or not and that has allowed us to walk this journey in a quiet confidence of peace. Psalm 23 sums this up better than I ever could: http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm%2023

Today we had probably the most poignant example of God being with us and giving us a gift of his presence than anything we have ever experienced in our lives. Many of you know that Bridget's Mom (Marilyn) played the harp exquisitely. Some of my best memories are of sitting on the screened in porch of her parents country home eating a fresh salad from her garden (she also loved to garden) while listening to her play the harp, often with the sound of crickets accompanying her. Needless to say harps are a strong symbol for Bridget (and her family) representing her Mom who died together with Bridget's Dad in a car accident not long after we were married. That was very tough when there is no warning and no chance to say goodbye. Anyway, prior to leaving home to travel out here Bridget and her sister went to St. Rose Convent where the Sisters of Perpetual Adoration have been praying nonstop for over 150 years (and they have included Bridget in those prayers thanks to many of you contacting them). When they were about to leave, there was an alcove that seemed to be beckoning them so they went toward it and there was a full size gorgeous harp. It gave Bridget a sense that her Mom was with her on this journey.

Later we were at the Minneapolis airport to fly out to California for all of this and Bridget unexpectedly ran into her sister Susie near the gate. As they were standing there, someone came by pulling a full size harp...they looked at each other in amazement. Today after Bridget was released from the ICU/hospital, we were standing waiting on the elevator so we could leave, and then almost as if in slow motion, the elevator doors opened and there before us was a wonderful lady with a harp! We just gave each other "the look" and laughed with joy at God's grace. Have any of you ever seen this many harps out in public? Its not like they are some common instrument like a guitar that is easy to cart around.

Bear with me here, the story is not over. About two hours later we were back at the clinic meeting with another wonderful staff member here, Candy, the nurse in radiation oncology who was explaining what to expect when the radiation treatments start. Once again, Bridget was connecting on a very personal and spiritual level with this wonderful person. As we were about to wrap things up, a harp began playing right next to the open door of the exam room we were in. It was like time stood still, Candy the nurse stopped talking, as she could see from Bridget's expression that something very important was happening here. Bridget began sobbing, I began crying. These were happy, blessed tears of joy at this gift Bridget was being given that her sweet Mom is with her, God is with her...the harp continued playing, I recognized the song to be Con Te Partiro (I'll Go With You) by Andrea Bocelli. We tried several times to get back to finishing up with Candy as she was very busy and needed to see other patients, but she continued to take time to nurture Bridget body and soul and let her experience that eternal blissful moment. We just kept lifting out heads, closing our eyes and soaking in that wonderful music to our soul as the tears of joy kept flowing. Wow!!! People I am generally not a real cryer, my kids probably have seen me cry once when we buried our first dog....but there is nothing else one can do when you experience this kind of Grace first hand.

The song is very special and very powerful, you have likely heard it. It is sung in Italian, here are some of the lyrics translated in English:

When I'm alone
I dream on the horizon
and words fail.....

I'll go with you, to places I never
saw and shared with you, now, yes
I shall experience them. I'll go with you
on ships across the seas....
with you I shall experience them.

Yes, I know that you are with me; you my
moon, are here with me, my sun, you are here with me, with me, with me....
with you I shall experience them again. I'll go with you, I with you.

Here is Andrea performing this song on YouTube:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tcrfvP11Hbo

As for me, I am slow dancing to this song with Bridget in our room now. Maybe you'll want to try that too with the love of your life. Live in the moment and there are no words!

Day After Surgery

Tom here late at night reflecting and trying to get my mind around what has gone on here. I woke up this morning and went jogging in the sunlight to burn off some of the nervous energy that had accumulated....wow did that do the trick. With flowers and blooms everywhere, I couldn't help but have the Genesis story reverberate in my mind....it was so nicely told at the Easter Vigil Mass we attended with family and our parish last Saturday evening before flying out here the next day on Easter. Also called Bridget's sister Susie and put her on speaker phone in the midst of the run to lead a prayer of thanksgiving. It was very special and it is a special time to be going through all of this with the hopefulness we are reminded of at and during the continuing Easter season.

Upon arrival at the ICU, the nurses told me Bridget was doing laps around the halls, she had already eaten breakfast when I entered the room and there she was with that look of wonderment and thankfulness that has been on her face ever since I first saw her after surgery. Bottom line is that last night was no fluke...she is doing AMAZINGLY well. She doesn't even have a scratchy throat or voice from being intubated....kudos to to her anesthesiologist, Dr. Chang who took good care of her as she was being operated on yesterday. Two of my brothers have been here since the surgery and they have been an immense source of support during these last few days. Thank you Billy and Steve!

Later in the day Dr. Badie tracked us down in a waiting area overlooking the mountains (Yes, Bridget was on another walk about the place)....he wanted to go over the results of the postsurgery MRI that Bridget had done just an hour or two before. This new MRI confirms that the tumor was fully removed! Proof positive. This puts Bridget in a much better position for even better results with the rest of her treatment and is the BEST POSSIBLE result we could have hoped for from this surgery especially when combined with the fact that the surgery did not result in any sort of paralysis. She was given the okay to check out of the ICU after only one night and it appears she may be getting released from the hospital entirely Thursday after just having had major brain surgery on Tuesday! She will be back to our cool cottage on the grounds here.

We are so humbly thankful, words cannot express. We are in a place where lots of people come with hope in their hearts and resiliency of spirit. You see it on display everywhere here...from bald children pushing IV racks while they walk outside to get fresh air to people in ICU beds of all ages and sizes. There is a spirit of shared experience here that is holy. I walked down a long hallway before leaving the hospital tonight. A beautiful African-American woman was walking beside me...the small talk led to introductions (Jenna)...her telling me she was here for two months while her daughter (Carmen) recovered from a bone marrow transplant for which this wonderful mother was the donor. I hugged her and told her how awesome she is and told her I would pray for them. Please include them in your prayers as well. She asked what I was doing here and that led to her promising to pray for Bridget and family. She said something about how we are all connected here....again back to that shared experience that I can only describe as holy.

It made me think of something earlier in the morning when a dignified, quiet, oriental woman quietly cleaned the floor in Bridget's room. I had just asked Bridget if she was okay with seeing my two brothers who wanted to say hi to her. Her reply was a forceful "Of course! I'm not worried what I look like, I'm just so glad to be alive!" She continued, "I'm happy for this moment and I have no ego." To that the tiny, focused woman cleaning the floor quickly glanced up with a piercingly gleeful look in her eyes. She nodded her head over and over and with a heavy Chinese accent laughingly said in broken English, "yes, yes, live in moment, no ego" and then continued to clean and quietly laugh as though confirming that Bridget had said something quite profound......and she had.

Successful Surgery!!!

Tom here again with the best possible news we could have hoped for...Bridget's surgery went great! Thank you God, thank you each and everyone for your prayers, and HUGE thank you to Dr. Badie and all of Bridget's other care givers during this journey! Special thanks to our good friend Dr. Greg Hartig for directing us to Dr. Badie and City of Hope (so appropriately named!).

Dr. Badie informed me that he was able to resect the tumor and he also injected the virus for the clinical trial that has many compelling potential benefits. I have only seen Bridget briefly in the recovery room, but with what she termed a "turbin" on her head and in a strong and very cute drugged up voice she immediately said, "Hey, I've got something to show you!" and she proceeded to hold up her left hand and touch the tips of each finger to her thumb showing that neurologically she had full function of her left hand and arm (tumor was on the right side of brain and that controls motor function on the left side of body). Dr. Badie had mentioned prior to surgery that the only thing he thought Bridget may experience could have been an initial effect to her left foot that may require a brace to help hold her foot up when walking for a while, but she also kicked off the covers to show me that all her toes wiggled and her ankle moved her foot up and down just fine. We looked at each other in thankful amazement and laughed out loud while crying happy tears! We couldn't have asked for a better result from this surgery! We are so, so thankful.

Next stop is ICU for a few days, and then regular medical floor for a few days before returning to our cool cottage on the premises here. She will be taking Acyclovir for 14 days as part of the virus clinical trial to try to kill off remaining tumor cells that take up the virus that was injected into her brain (it is also postulated that this virus approach could make the cells more suseptible to radiation). As soon as she gets clearance, she will begin radiation treatments and be taking a standard oral chemotherapeutic agent that is very well tolerated, both over the course of the next six weeks.

The above picture was just taken on Friday by our good friend (and very talented photographer) Heather Sysimaki. Not only did she quickly take many awesome pictures, but somehow managed to provide us with a beautiful photo album to take with us to California for Bridget to look at all the time while she recovers. Bridget has said many times that the toughest part of

this for her is being away from our kids, so this really helps. Thank you Heather.

Thank you to everyone for the meals for our kids especially now our Roncalli Newman Church members who are now providing meals for our kids while we are away. Thank you, thank you, each and everyone of you, many of whom we have never met for all of your support and prayers during this. Words cannot express our appreciation. Please continue your prayers as Bridget continues to show us all how challenges such as this can be handled with grace, unshakable faith, and continued concern and giving for others even as she faces this personal challenge. I knew she was amazing when I married her, but she has really taken it to another level here. I am in awe of her optimistism, strength, peacefulness, and connectedness with God and the eternal.